Self-Harm: Understanding and Getting Support

If you are in danger right now: if you are badly hurt or the bleeding will not stop, call an ambulance on 10177, or 112 from a mobile. If you feel you might end your life, call the Suicide Crisis Helpline on 0800 567 567.

If you hurt yourself to get through, you are not broken and you are not alone. Many people use self-harm to cope with pain that feels too big to hold. You deserve care, not judgement.

What is happening

Self-harm means hurting yourself on purpose to cope with feelings. People describe it as a release, a way to feel something when numb, or a way to punish themselves. It often starts in the teen years but can happen at any age.

Self-harm is a sign of distress, not attention-seeking. It can bring short relief, but the pain usually comes back, and the harm can become more serious over time. Some people who self-harm also have thoughts of suicide, so it is important to be honest with someone about both.

The urge to self-harm rises and falls like a wave. Learning other ways to ride the wave, and getting help with what is underneath, really helps.

Signs to notice

• Hurting yourself when stressed, angry or numb
• Hiding injuries with clothes, even in the heat
• Feeling relief afterwards, then shame
• The urges are coming more often
• Feeling alone, empty or hopeless
• Keeping things you could use nearby "just in case"

30-second self-check

Answer yes or no. If you answer yes to the first question, stop here and get help now: call 10177 or 112, or 0800 567 567.

• Are you badly hurt, or are you thinking of ending your life?
• Have you hurt yourself in the last week?
• Are the urges getting stronger or more frequent?
• Have your injuries become more serious?
• Are you keeping it secret from everyone?
• Are you drinking or using drugs to cope?

0-1 yes: If your yes was the first question, get help now. Otherwise, please still tell someone you trust. You do not have to carry this alone.
2-3 yes: This is weighing on you. Talk to someone this week: the Cleared Mind 24-hour Careline on 0800 212 146, or a doctor or counsellor.
4 or more yes: Please reach out today. Call the Suicide Crisis Helpline on 0800 567 567, or the Cleared Mind Careline on 0800 212 146.

What you can do next

• Today: Look after any injury: keep it clean and covered, and get medical help if it is deep or will not heal. When an urge comes, try to delay for 10 minutes: hold ice, splash cold water on your face or go outside.
• This week: Tell one person you trust, or a counsellor. You can say, "I have been hurting myself and I want help to stop."
• This month: Work with a counsellor or psychologist on what sets off the urges. Make a safety plan with other ways to cope and people to call.
• If you are a parent: stay calm, thank them for telling you and get them to a professional. Anger or punishment makes secrecy more likely.

Your tool

Suicide and Self-Harm Check-in - asks a few private questions and connects you to a counsellor or crisis line straight away if you need it. There is no score.

When to get professional help

Get help if you self-harm at all, and urgently if injuries are serious or you have thoughts of suicide. Counsellors and psychologists help many people find other ways to cope.
Who can help: emergency services (ambulance), psychologists, counsellors, doctors, nurses

Getting help in South Africa

• Suicide Crisis Helpline (0800 567 567): free, 24 hours.
• Cleared Mind 24-hour Careline (0800 212 146): confidential counselling any time.
• SADAG Mental Health Line (011 234 4837, 08:00-20:00): support and referrals to local help.
• Childline (116): for anyone under 18.
• Clinics and GPs: wound care and referral to mental health support.