Children and trauma

Watching a child struggle after a frightening or traumatic event is hard for any parent or caregiver. Children process trauma differently to adults, and with the right support, most children recover and continue to grow well.

What it is

Children may experience trauma from a range of events - an accident, violence, loss of a loved one, or witnessing something frightening. Because children have fewer words and less life experience to make sense of what happened, trauma often shows up in behaviour and play rather than in things they say directly. Younger children may regress to earlier behaviours, while older children and teens may withdraw or act out. This is the mind's way of trying to process something overwhelming.

Signs to notice

• Regression, such as bedwetting, clinginess or baby talk in younger children
• Repetitive play that re-enacts parts of the event
• New fears, nightmares or difficulty sleeping alone
• Irritability, tantrums or aggression that is out of character
• Withdrawal from friends, school or activities they used to enjoy
• Physical complaints like stomach aches or headaches with no clear medical cause

What helps

• Keep routines predictable - familiar mealtimes, bedtimes and rules offer a sense of safety
• Answer questions honestly, using simple, age-appropriate language
• Reassure the child they are safe now and that their feelings are normal
• Allow the child to express themselves through play, drawing or talking, without forcing it
• Limit exposure to distressing news or repeated retelling of the event around them
• Stay calm and patient - children take cues from the adults around them

When to reach out for help

Consider a professional assessment if symptoms persist beyond a month, worsen over time, or interfere with school, sleep, friendships or family life. A child or educational psychologist can assess what support a child needs and guide the family through recovery.

Getting help in South Africa

Cleared Mind's EAP can guide parents to appropriate child and family support, and SADAG offers information and referrals for children's mental health concerns.

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If you or someone else is in immediate danger, reach out now. SADAG Suicide Crisis Helpline (24h): 0800 567 567 or SMS 31393. SAPS 10111, ambulance 10177, GBV Command Centre 0800 428 428.